Lady In The Trap (Part 3)

Although I had started a new job a couple of months ago, my friend Laila and I had already made plans for her birthday. It felt so good to get away and be beside the ocean, but just like I brought back peace, I also brought back a flesh-eating fungus on my nail. I had an appointment to get my nail removed later today and I was beyond ready for this thing to come off. My phone buzzed and it was a text message from a number that I didn’t know. I opened it.
“Mina? Is this Mina?” it read.
“And this is?” I replied.
“Paul.” I almost threw my phone! I picked up the work phone and buzzed Ameila.
“You busy?”
She heard the panic. “Are you ok?”
“Come to the front real quick.” I disconnected the call.
I heard her rolling out of her chair and heading my way. It was a desk adjacent to mine, so she rounded me and sat down.
“What’s up?” she was searching my face. I had no words. I give her the phone so she could read the message. Her head pops up and she has the same look that I have.
“What does it want?” she ask me.
“I have no idea. Like….how did he get my number?!” How is this happening?! I had done so much work trying to move on from him. There were only a few people who knew the whole story. Ameila and my friend Laila were the ones who saw me hit rock bottom over this guy. He was like kryptonite and I wanted to stay as far away from him as possible. I blocked him on all forms of social media and asked my friends to block him as well so that he couldn’t see me. Apparently, he had gotten another number because the one that I knew he had, I had that one blocked.
“Mina. Just tell him not to contact you anymore.” I wish it was that simple. Now that I’m in therapy, these feelings that I’ve suppressed for so long are now coming to the surface and I don’t know what to do with them. I have so many feelings towards him, so many questions, and I don’t know what to do or how to process. A part of me wants to know what he wants and another part of me just wants him to disappear.
“Amelia-“
“No, Mina!” She stops me mid-sentence. She knows where I’m going with this.
“Give me a day to think. I won’t reply back to his message today,” I respond to her. She knows that I’m lying. She knows that at some point of the day, I am going to reply back. I don’t want to, but he is my vice. I’m definitely scheduling an emergency session as soon as I leave for my appointment.
“Mina, you are going to reply back. You may as well do it now.” She was right and I hated it. Of all the men I ever talked to, I was weak for this man, but I decided against it. I took my phone back from her and erased the number.
“I won’t be replying back at all, sis. I erased the number.” I felt proud and crushed at the same time, but I had to do it. I still feel a little shame about being involved with a married man. I’m still recovering from my bad decisions now. It took an emotional toll on me. It had gotten so bad that out of seven days, I was drinking all 7. I was going through 4-5 bottles of wine per week- the big ones. When I started therapy last year, my therapist told me to put the wine down, and I did. I didn’t need to go back to suppressing anything. I wanted to get back to the life that I was trying my best to live.
“Good for you.” Amelia smiles at me. She gets up from the desk and make her way back to her office.
……
I pick up the phone to let Amelia know that I was leaving for my appointment. I close out of the system and gather my things to go. As soon as I get to the door to leave my phone dings indicating that I have a message from someone on Facebook messenger. I wait until I get in the car to check it. It was Theo. He found me on Facebook.
“Hey friend. How’s your day going?” Be cool, sis. Be cool.
“Hello, Theo. It’s going well. Yours?
“It’s going ok. A little tired. I’ve been looking on Facebook for you for weeks.” His reply surprises me.
“Lol really?!” because I am really surprised.
“Man yeah. The only way that I found you was because I saw you were tagged in a mutual friend’s photo. This whole time you were right under my nose.” Murray’s hair grease slick.
“Now, I’m about to stalk your page now.” Stalk?! Words like that freak me out.
“Woah!” I replied.
“Nah, not like that. Just wanna see what you got going on. That’s all.” What he meant was he was going to go through posts and photos to see if I’m connected to another man. He’s probably looking for Paul. He won’t find he and I on social media.
“Why do all of that when you can just ask me?”
“Let’s go to the movies or something-just as friends.” Siiiiiiiiisssssss!!!! Wait a minute! I looked at the clock and saw that I had 10 minutes before my appointment, so I crank the car and zoomed out the parking lot to the doctor’s office. I waited until I signed in at the doctor’s to reply back.
“Don’t you have a girlfriend?!” I was not in the business of talking to anybody else that was involved with someone else. I can’t do that to myself anymore.
“We broke up that night after we saw you in Taco Bell. It was bound to happen sooner or later. It just happened that night.” Shoot! I hope they didn’t get into an argument about our interaction. I didn’t ask him to come over there and talk to me.
“It had nothing to do with me and you talking. It just all boils down to we just want different things.” It was like he could read my thoughts.
“So, you’re asking me out on a date?” I reply. This man could definitely be lying.
“I said as friends though because if you try to get fresh with me, I’m going to tase you, lol!” I was howling. I forgot that I was in the doctor’s office. I caught myself when I heard the nurse call me by my last name to go to the back. I decided to wait until I left the room getting my nail removed to reply back.
…
We had decided to go to a local restaurant for our first date. I was having a hard time trying to decide what I wanted to wear. My 11yr old daughter decided to dress me.
“Here, mama. Wear this dress with these shoes.” She had picked out a short black sundress and strappy tan heels.
“Sis. I’m trying to be as comfortable as possible.” I sit on the bed annoyed at all the clothes that I had been through and why I was going through so much work to look good for this man.
“Here. Wear your Vans with the dress then.” She hand me the shoes to put on. I put them on and stand I the mirror to see how it looked. It looked good, but I was missing something.
“It’s missing something, Bell.” Looking in the mirror trying to figure out what’s missing.
“Oh! A necklace. Hold on. Mama!” She runs across the hall to the bathroom and picks out a necklace to go with the shoes that I had on.
“Yep. That’s it, sis!” I once over myself in the mirror and she was right. The outfit was a go- cute and comfy. I grab my phone off the bed to let Amelia know that I was on my way to bring Bella. She had agreed to watch her for me while I went out. Bella had a bag packed, so I knew that she didn’t have any plans to come back home.
We get to Amelia’s and she comes out to chat with me a minute before I leave. My phone buzz and it was Theo letting me know that he was on his way to get me and to send him my address. I zoom home to cut off the lights and reapply my lipstick. I text him to tell him to text me and no sooner than I hit send, he texted me to let me know that he was outside. I didn’t want him to come to the door so I bolted down the hallway so that I could scurry out the door. I hit the light switch to turn the porch light on, grabbed my keys from the table that was by the door, and head out. He was emerging from the car by the time I got to the front steps. He stopped in his tracks when he saw me. I walked on to the passenger side of his car.
“Dang, Mina! I didn’t know you owned more than work clothes.” His humor had become my favorite. He was quick on his feet with wit.
“Shut up, Theo! All you had to say was I looked good,” rolling my eyes and laughing.
“You look aight with your lil dress on. I see them legs though!” He was eyeing me and was letting me know that I, indeed, looked good.
“Let’s go, boy! I’m over you already.”
I opened my door and got in.
“Oh, I got something for you.” He opened the back door and reached on the floor.
“Close your eyes for me, please,” he asked me. I closed my eyes and waited for whatever he had, praying that he wasn’t about to try something slick. I’d really hate to fight him in his car in my front yard.
“Hold out your hand for me.”
I was eager. I held out my hand and he placed something that felt like a gift bag.
“Open your eyes.” It was indeed a bag filled with my favorite goodies- chocolates, chips, and gift cards.
“What?! How did you know I liked this?!” I was shocked.
“I do my research,” he shrugged, meaning social media or Amelia. I was indeed smitten. I was a simple person. I hated flowers and the like, but stuff like this was equivalent to a bouquet of roses.
“Thank you.” He replied with a nod. We decided to eat at the local seafood restaurant here in town because we both didn’t feel like skipping town for dinner. We arrived at the restaurant and since there wasn’t a lot of people there, we decided to sit outside. We made small talk until the waiter came to take our drink order.
“So… what made you ask me out?” I was indeed curious. He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms.
“It was the green dress.” I was puzzled. I had no idea what he was talking about.
“The green dress? What green dress?” I didn’t want to sound defensive , but I needed to make sure he wasn’t getting me confused with someone else.
“Yeah. The green dress you had on when I first met you. I had my eye on your co-worker, but when I saw you I was like ‘man this girl is cute’, but when you stood up in that dress that day, I just had to have you for myself.”
“Wait a minute. So, you mean to tell me that it was the dress?” I honestly didn’t know how I felt about that.
“Don’t trip. Your personality is banging. Every time I’ve called and you answered the phone, you always sound so happy and you were super friendly, but what can I say? I’m a man, and men are visual creatures,” he shrugged his response out. I was getting ready to respond when I saw a familiar face approaching the area where we were sitting. As they got closer, I could make out who it was. It was Paul. It had been a week and a half since he texted me and I didn’t reply back. When he finally saw me he stopped in his tracks. We made eye contact long enough for him to slightly nod at me. My eyes grew large. It was our gesture when we dated and we saw each other in public. It was our way of saying I see you and I love you. I turned my attention back to Theo who was staring at me.
“You ok?” He asked me, searching my face to make sure that I was ok. “It looks like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“Yeah, I’m ok,” I smile through my response. I turned my head to look in Paul’s way again and it was at that moment that I realized that he wasn’t alone. His wife was with him.
“Mina,” Theo called out to me.
“Yeah?” I snap back to reality and face him.
“You sure you’re ok? You look uncomfortable. We can go if you want to.”
“Do you mind if we get the food to go? We can sit on my back patio and just have dinner there if you’re ok with it?” I was ready to get out of there. Being in the same space as Paul and his wife was triggering. I needed to be out of there and fast.
“Yeah, I’m cool with that. I’ll go grab the waiter so he can get our orders,” he says as he’s getting out of his chair. Paul and his wife were passing us, heading inside the restaurant.
“No, it’s cool. We can wait until he comes out,” I grab his hand before he makes it all the way up out his chair. The hand grab was intentional. Paul saw it. I know he did.
“That’s the guy from Taco Bell.” Wait, what?!
“Are you asking me or are you telling me?” I need to know where he is going with this so I will know how to respond.
“I’m just letting you know that I pay attention.” I’m guessing that was his way of letting me know that nothing gets by him. All I could do was nod my head.
The waiter finally came back to the table and we placed our orders to go. I had my mind on the bottle of sweet red wine in my fridge, so I ordered grilled fish and shrimp with a side salad. He ordered fried catfish with all the trimmings. We made comfortable conversation as we waited for our food to come out. He was indeed a jokester. It has been forever since I had genuinely laughed this hard. He had the worst humor and was extremely quick with wit. Our food finally came and he goes inside to the counter to pay. I was getting ready to make a quick trip to the restroom when Paul meets me at the door.
“I really need to talk to you,” he says with earnest eyes.
My pulse leaps and it feels as if the vein in my neck is about to explode.
“Paul, what are you doing?! I’m here with someone and you are here with your wife!” I snip out, frustrated at his approach.
“Mina-,”
“Is everything ok, Mina?” Theo is now standing behind Paul, searching my face and trying to make sure that I was ok.
“Yes. Everything is fine,” Paul answers for me.
“Mina. Is everything ok?” He calmly asked me again.
“Yes. Everything is ok, Theo. I’m ready to go when you are,” meaning can we please get out of here-STAT!
“Excuse me, brotha,” Theo says to Paul.
Paul is hesitant to move, but he moves out of the way when he sees the frustration and embarrassment in my eyes.
He steps to the side as Theo walks out of the door. Theo grabs my hand and give it a little squeeze. I got you was what he was saying. I look at him and give a soft smile.
“Nice to see you, Paul,” I say to him and Theo and I turn and leave the outside seating area and head to the parking lot.
“You wanna talk-,” I cut him off mid-sentence.
“Wine. I need a glass of wine. And no. I really don’t want to talk about it.” I honestly didn’t, but I knew I needed to give him some kind of explanation being that this was our first date and there had been a man to approach me. Ok was all he said to me until we reached his car.
“You know at some point we are going to have to talk about this. It was kinda rude for a first date,” he says as he walks up on me.
I took a minute to drink him in. That burnt orange v-neck and denim jeans on that dark skin is a sight for sore eyes. He’s so close that I can smell the mixture of soap and cologne on his skin.
“I’m really sorry about that. That was so embarrassing. Let’s go to my house and we’ll talk about it there,” I say to him.
He nods his head and open my door so that I could get in. I watched him walk around to the driver’s side and slide in. This man oozed charm. Even the way he sits behind the wheel is a sight to see. I hoped that I hadn’t ruined the night or ruined something before it could get started good.
“I thought for a minute I was gonna have to handle ol’ buddy right quick,” he said as he started the engine.
I laughed, relieved that the tension was broken.
“Oh my goodness! You most definitely wasn’t about to do that!”
“I mean, you looked like he was bothering you. I just couldn’t stand there and watch that. Besides, he’s after what I’m after. I could look at him and tell.”
Before I could reply his phone ring. “Hold on one second,” he said as he reached for his phone. When he looked down he made a raspberry.
“Lemme take this real quick.”
I looked out the window, but I was indeed listening.
“Yo!” He howled in the phone. I could hear the same high pitched voice from that day in the office.
“I told you that I had plans and you’re keeping me from them,” he said to the girl on the phone. I could tell that he was looking at me, so I turned to face him.
“Look, just leave them with your mom and I will pick them up when I’m done and take them back to my spot.” I could tell he was getting agitated. His demeaner hardened and was replaced with someone I didn’t know. I could hear the person on the phone get louder with him and he had reached his limit.
“Listen. Either you stay home and not go or take them to your mom’s and I get them when I’m done. This conversation is over.” He hits end and throws his phone in the middle console and closes it. I want to say something, but I don’t know what to say. He blows a raspberry and run his hand across his face.
“You ok?” I wasn’t asking to be nosey. I was really asking to see if he was really ok. Naaaahhhh, who am I kidding?! I was definitely being nosey.
“That was my baby mama. She’s usually cool, but this evening she wants to go out with her friends, and I told her that I already had plans,” he said, extremely annoyed.
“Do you need to go or something?”
“Nah. I said what I said and I meant what I said. I’m with you. It’s not an emergency, so she can wait,” he said as he smoothly put the car in reverse to back out of the parking space. Why is this man behind the wheel sexy to me?! I was curious, so I had to ask.
“Are yall really over?” He put the car in drive but hit the brakes. He looked over at me.
“One thing you don’t have to worry about me doing is lying to you about something like that. All these other dudes gone lie to you about something like that. Not me. I let you know up front what it is and let you decide.” All I could do was nod my head. He put the car in drive and pulled out of the parking lot. Instead of conversation, he turned up the music, which gave me time to sort through my thoughts. I thought about Paul and what happened in the restaurant and what I was going to tell him, about whether or not I wanted to keep talking to him with the fear of baby mama drama, and the fact that if he had to use the bathroom would I let him use mine or not. Odd thought, but whatever.
We rounded the corner that led to my house and he pulled into my driveway.
“If you want, you can go ahead and pull around back so we don’t have to walk. If you’re going to though, let me get out here so I can go in and grab everything and I’ll meet you on the patio,” I tell him.
He nods his head and stops in the driveway to let me out. I scurry out of the car and so I can grab everything before I head out the back door to meet him. I grab 2 glasses, one of the bottles of wine from the fridge, and a roll of paper towels.
By the time I got out back, he was laying the food out on the table. He grabbed his lighter from his pocket and went over to light the two front tiki lights. I sat down at the table and waited for him to join me.
“I don’t do baby mama drama,” I say to him once he sits down.
“She’s really cool. We both agreed on the split. It’s just tonight she wanna go celebrate her promotion and when we were together, I’d usually drop what I’m doing to be there so she could do whatever, but we aren’t anymore, and since she’s got the kids, she’s got to figure it out.”
“Fair enough,” was all I had to say.
“So, tell me about Paul,” he said as he took a bite of his fish and leaned back in his chair.
I took a deep breath and gave him the condensed version of our story. I told him about how we had known each other for years before we actually started seeing each other and that he married someone else other than me. I also told him about how we continued to see each other after he had gotten married and that two years ago I decided to just completely ghost him and not talk to him ever again.
“So, what was up in Taco Bell?” He wanted to know it all. Why am I telling him all of my business?!
“It was his first time seeing me since I had ghosted him,” I said as I took a sip of my wine. I was thankful for the alcohol because it calmed the ball of nerves that were inside.
“Hmmmm. Ok,” was all he said as he took a swig of his wine.
“That’s all you want to know?” I was curious.
“Is that all you want to tell me?” I had told him too much already and I didn’t know if he believed me or if this would be our last date. I remembered what my therapist said only share with people who have earned the right to know.
“That’s all you need to know for now,” I answered him, gauging his response.
“I’m cool with that,” was all he said to me and took another bite of his food.
“So, Mina. What do you like to do other than look good in green dresses?” He asked me as I was taking a bite of my food. I smiled at him and told him some of my hobbies and he shared with me some of his. I was surprised that he came out the gate with all the hard questions regarding money, marriage and raising children. We stayed out on my patio until 5 in the morning. Although I didn’t know how it would end, this was one of the best dates I had had in a long time.